Thursday, 13 August 2009

Maybe today, the world might be a more colourful place...

Why Hello :)

Tonight I make my return to blogging! I don't really know why, I think it's quite an odd concept actually, but theres something ultimately cathartic about the whole thing.

Anyway, just to make up for my abandonment I'd say I'll rattle on a fair bit.

An increasingly noticable theme that seems to be recurring around my circle of friends and onward into society as a whole is that of extreme self-involved paranoia. I am guilty of being a headcase at the best of times, but recently I've noticed other people catching up and being more vocal about their negative emotions. The problem remains as to just how necessary it is to express how you feel. A Sub-Camp Queer (I'll explain later) rule was to not be self-depricating, it was a wonderful idea that some of us made a concerted effort to follow the entire weekend. Just how effective was it to our own self worth though? Just because we don't say certain negative things doesn't mean we don't feel them. Undoubtably in oh so many cases things are said for attention, for a constant need to feel assured of ones own value, secure in the knowledge you don't look grotesque, sound stupid, act unconventionally. On the other hand does stifling these feelings inside yourself allowing them to fester without interference allow for a more socially acceptable outcome? It seems feigned self-hatred is all the rage these days, and it makes a genuine cry for help get lost amongst the flurry of cries for attention. Self worth should only ever be viewed as an abstract concept anyway, no one is worth anything, we were all born and we will all die, what happens in the middle is filled with what we want to fill it with, and no one can judge anothers worth from their own subjective choices. It's completely illogical to assign degrees of good upon an independant entity, so why does it suddenly become acceptable to ascribe it to ourselves?

Onward to happier and less head melting subjects, as I mentioned above Sub-Camp Queer was formed at Forfey (hopefully not to perpetuate the idea of band gang culture). Since then we have been meeting up regularly,specifically thanks to a wonderful young lady who shall only be known as Tesco Value Whiskey, I am immensely glad to have met such a person, and although I knew most of the other members of Camp Queer reasonably well, I think as a group we can take over the world! Happier times are to come for us all!

A selection of Sub Camp Queeros, Ruth's in this photo too but blogspot is mysteriously cutting the silly photo in two! Damn you technology! ...I'm joking I love you...don't ever change

Music has been sweeeet the past few months, I've been sorting out my back cat (I'm such a hmv drone) and I have been properly immersed in some pretty fantastic stuff. First and foremost Frightened Rabbit, but I'm still on a Manchester Orchestra buzz too! I've been hitting the oldies again, more Dylan and Neil Young. I'm moving away from my Emmy the Great and other female singer/songwriter obsession though, no real surprise there, there's been a bit of a lull recently. I lost my itunes library, I'm pretty devastated, but I'm holding out hope that the internet will hold the answer to somehow getting it back, it's going to take an age to put all the cd's on, nevermind the downloaded stuff! oh dearie me!

This entry hasn't been half as intense as I imagined, I suppose I have done an excepional job of avoiding saying the important things and instead only skimming the surface of this crazy life! And that, my friends, is why I never had a flair for reviewing!

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